Tuesday, October 7, 2008

…..and so my grandmother is on orkut!!!!

So my grandmother is on Orkut. She's 95 and she's there for activity partners and dating (men). Her birthday is 3rd September, 1920, coz that's the oldest you can get on orkut, but to be frank she doesn't look a day over 92

She says she's widowed with 5 children, which is strange as my grandfather is alive and has only 2 (according to his Facebook records). She switched to Scientology after Tom Cruise took it up (she's a big fan you know). She still thinks that the Kauravas and Pandavas are the only two political parties in the world. She drinks occasionally, and has a cigar every now and then. She has a blog, www.blogspot.grannywrites.com . You can always get her on her yahoo messenger id, stillalive1876@yahoo.com .

Going into her personal page on her profile, you'll find that the first thing you'll notice about her is her ability to breathe. She has a strategically placed tattoo (it says), which is funny coz I thought pierced ears was the only thing. Her best feature is her eye, not both but just the left one (the right one is blind due to cataract). Her turn ons are candlelight dinners coz that's how she's been having them since her childhood.
Her turn offs are 7pm.

Her orkut stats (lovable, coolness, trustworthy) are 90-60-90 which is surprisingly close to her real life vital stats.

She has around 258 testimonials, all from guys (living or dead). Looking through the one my grandfather wrote her, it says "I loved those rides we had together", which confused me coz I don't think there were any vehicles when they met. I wonder if it was on a horse… or like a horse. She has a testimonial from C.K. Nayadu, the first captain of the Indian cricket team, and M.S. Dhoni, the current captain of the cricket team… and from every other captain in between (she has her standards you know).

So one day my grandmother decided to put up a picture of hers and automatically her friend list halved (just like what happens to girls in IIT), but that was just for a day. The next day it doubled, when she put up a picture of her with her clothes on.

She is a moderator for the Youth For Equality community on Orkut. She was an active campaigner during the reservation issue. Of course, she had thought it was reservation for people above 90 in undergraduate universities.

Recently though, she's been told by some of her friends that its not safe to use orkut. People have used her photos in sites like desinani.com and gilfhunter.com. And so now my grandmother is on Myspace.

1 comment:

Satya said...

GOD ARTICLE! who was this? butthal? akhil? man it WAS funny....of course i did notice a lot of 'borrowed humor concepts' but well compiled.